Today I choose happiness

Posted on by View from the ground

View from the ground

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“Happiness does not depend on what you have or who you are. It solely relies on what you think.” – Buddha.

Welcome to a new day and to the latest View From The Ground blog.

Today’s thoughts have sprung to mind as a bit of a curve ball. I had set out some thoughts for a different blog, but then I read an article (yes, sorry, I’ve been reading again!) and it changed my thinking. Primarily, because of the way I’ve been thinking.

I don’t know about you but this last week has been a real struggle. Feelings of real despondency, nothing is good enough. Feelings of a lack of self worth have been abundant and days of worry, worry, worry. I’m sure I am not on my own, and I guess I am reaching out to others who may be feeling the same. In the main, to say that we know we can do something about it and that we need to move out of this state of mind. We have the power. We ARE the power to stop this and today is the day.

So, it was with interest that I came across this article this morning – at time when I was reflecting on things.

Bearing in mind I have focussed a lot of my recent blogs on living in the present and on the overall concept around mindfulness, why have I been fed up with yesterday (not literally, as yesterday was a day in the sun! My idea of bliss); worrying about tomorrow: so not really celebrating life today.

Bearing in mind over the last week, I have had some good times meeting friends for a catch up and there’s been some enjoyable family time, what’s the problem?

And then, when I was doing a ‘wide awake’ meditation, it came to me. Happiness!

Happiness? Yes, HAPPINESS!

Of course, I am a happy man. I am grateful and therefore I am happy. But, and here’s the big but (note, no picture included of a big butt for comedic effect). I have forgotten how to think happiness, to show happiness, and to share happiness. Am I on my own?

I look in the mirror and I see grumpy. I’m grateful, therefore I’m happy, but I look grumpy. How does that effect others? The answer is obvious. How many others are the same?

So, to see this article today has been a gift. I was hooked by the words ‘How to be happy’.

In reality, what I read and what I want to share is not rocket science. Nothing in life is. It’s about belief and application. It’s about not allowing that belief to be polluted by those whose interests are better served by you being in a state of lacking of self worth and self belief.

The key to happiness, latest research tells us, is knowing where to look. As it rightly reflects, from a young age it is programmed into us to aim high and to seek happiness in a better job, new achievement and further success. Think about it. How this programming occurs. What we read, what we see on TV, what we are told by ‘greater minds’.

But, these goals are more likely to make us miserable. Being driven may hold us back, says Dr Raj Raghunathan at the University of Texas.

The doctor’s research shows that supposedly successful and “intelligent” people don’t make life choices that lead to happiness. He saw that after a reunion with his PhD class, the more visible the achievements – be that success at work promotions, pay rises, fancy holidays and bigger homes – the more unfulfilled and distracted the group seemed overall.

Through his research, Dr Raj Raghunathan identified five key areas that can have a huge effect on our wellbeing – all of which are within our control. And, as I’ve said above, that’s the thing. We can control that state of mind.

So, let’s look at these areas and see how we can learn.

Don’t pursue happiness – the advice is to prioritise rather than chase happiness. An interesting balance here because a lot of well meaning advice is that we must pursue happiness, almost at all cost. But there is a big difference. Many of us believe, in theory, that to chase happiness – whatever it actually is – is important and place it above being intelligent and making money, and yet in reality we sacrifice happiness for other things.

We should therefore take steps to increase the chances of FEELING happy rather than obsessing about whether or not you feel happy. We should take steps to prioritise by recognising what makes us happy – going to the pub with friends, countryside walks, holidays, time with the family etc, and then build around those things.

Make a list, prioritise that list, and take action.

I hope that makes sense.

Take responsibility for your happiness – don’t blame others for your unhappiness. Tell yourself it’s in your own hands, whatever the outcome – because it is.

I definitely find this so relevant because, when I’m unhappy, I have a tendency to blame others or circumstances created by others. But, don’t most of us do that?

But, we do have the power and ability to control our own thoughts and feelings, regardless of what is happening to us externally. Feeling in control internally is highly liberating and will make you feel happier.

As is recommended in the article, an easier way to take some control is to look at our lifestyle. Now,here’s where I add my own spin on things as I am the last one to preach about what to eat and drink. As those that know me would confirm, I love a glass of wine and am partial to a regular Indian take away.

However, I also love a long walk, I enjoy fruit and veg and, of late, have sought to increase my intake. Little changes like that can make a difference..

Don’t compare – in the words of the late, great Prince ‘nothing compares to you’ so why place any importance whatsoever to feeling superior to others, you’ll end up being frustrated a lot of the time.

Even if you think you’re doing better than your peers, sooner or later someone will overtake you. And, why is it important? Why can we not just be happy being who we are, what we are, and how we are?

For some comparisons can be tempting – they are used as a way to try to motivate ourselves.

We can strive to be the best at what we do – but surely that should be to DO the best at what we do? If we do the best and that in turn is THE best – in the world, in the Company, in the team – great! But, as long as we do our best at anything that we do, surely that should give us the happiness that we deserve. The less you compare, the happier you will be.

Follow the flow – for some of us the starting point is to get on the flow. But once we are in the flow, we need to follow it and just go with it. Most of us have experienced it, maybe not even realising it, where we experience something where we get lost in what we are doing and time just doesn’t matter. For me, that is when I am writing. Once I get started, I could write for what feels like 30 minutes but 3 hours later I wonder where has that time gone.

Personally, apart from time with family and friends, I am at my truest state of happiness when I am writing. Now, I accept, I am not a trained writer. I have got a qualification in relation to writing. But, do you know what? I don’t care! I love writing. I haven’t got a qualification in the consumption of Indian food but that doesn’t stop me eating it.

So, here’s the challenge for you. Think about what you truly love; what makes you come alive; where you lose track of time. Hopefully, there’s a few things. But make a list, prioritise and get in the flow. Imagine how magnificent you will feel.

Trust strangers – now, this is a really interesting one and it’s the one where I raised an eyebrow of suspicion. But, I read on so please bear with me because the theory present is quite simple in hat the more we perceive we can trust people we don’t know, the happier we’ll be.

Dr Raj Raghunathan has written that the happiest countries and communities are those that feel they can trust the citizens around them. Simply put, if you can’t trust your taxi driver to give you the right change, or the bank clerk to count out the right money, you’ll lose sleep and you won’t be happy. It’s one thing to trust friends and family, but having faith in strangers is an indication of how much you’ll trust life in general.

So, here’s another challenge – and this is definitely one for me as well – try being more open; talk to one stranger each day – in a shop, at work. Focus on the positive aspect of talking to people you don’t know; not the fear that you can’t trust them. Try it, and tell me how you get on. Email address: jonlduke@icloud.com.

It’s quite simple. But, from a personal perspective, this will be one day at a time. I definitely choose happiness and I am so grateful hat I have identified what is causing my state of mind. I be happy is one this, but to FEEL happy is another.

It’s up to me, no one else. In the words of Michael Jackson, “I’m gonna make a change, for once in my life. It’s gonna feel real good. Gonna make a difference. Gonna make it right.” – Man In The Mirror.

Thank you for letting me share this ‘awakening’ with you. If it’s helped you in any way, I feel blessed to have achieved that.

Take care. Happiness is beautiful. Until the next time.
Jon

What’s my age?

Posted on by View from the ground

View from the ground

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“I’m happy to report that my inner child is still ageless.” – James Broughton

Well, I’m happy to report it’s raining outside …….. again. When I say happy, I’m happy that I can report it’s raining outside. That means: –

* I woke up;
* I’m inside being able to look outside;
* I have vision to see the rain;
* I don’t have to go outside in the rain;
* I have the technology to report it’s raining; and
* I am very grateful that at least one person is reading this.

I am grateful / thankful for all of the above.

Welcome to my latest view from the ground. I sometimes wonder if I should call the blogs ‘view from the comfy chair’, as I tend to write the blogs whilst sitting in the living room (lounge). Usually there is music playing. Today, I have the delights of Ben playing FIFA on his Play Station 4. Love his company. I’m grateful. Maybe I’ll set up a new group. Who knows.

Those who have visited recent blogs will have observed that my current path has taken me to focus on living in the present. The last blog, ‘a view from the ground look at mindfulness‘ very much dealt with how looking at enjoying the present can help our mind not to regret yesterday or worry about tomorrow.

I guess I am focussing on how to just enjoy life. I’ve talked to a lot of people recently who are struggling with how they feel at present. They are full of regret, worry, and an overall heaviness. It’s the latter that causes the worry because, in many cases, they don’t know why they feel heavy / overwhelmed by a sense of darkness.

There’s no doubt, from a personal perspective, my moods have been, at best, erratic (I had to make sure that hadn’t spell checked as erotic. This blog site isn’t a place for sharing those thoughts. Please visit ………….. only joking!). Worry about past mistakes, worry about tomorrow’s events, worry full stop. I need to take my own advice. Live in the present.

Now, living in the present is, there is no doubt, the best place to be. But, then, even then, have you looked in the mirror and though ‘where did all that time go’? We suddenly feel our AGE.

Well, a recent blog by the great Dr. David Hamilton gave me a well timed slap in the face. The blog, How To Slow Ageing – was an excellent read. I love his books – very inspirational and last year’s ‘I ❤️ Me’ put me on my road towards understanding self belief and self love.

I was interested in the blog that Dr. David said that we have two ages. The chronological age, which is the number of years we have lived, and. the physiological age, which is the age of the body, and that depends to a large extent on diet, exercise and attitude. By doing the right things, the physiological age can go backwards.

With regards to the chronological age, I looked up one of many definitions of age – “the amount of time during which a person or animal has lived. Or, the amount of time during which a thing has existed. Or, the time of life when a person does something or becomes legally able to do something.”

Okay, simply put, not a great deal that we can do about that.

So, back to the physiological age. Dr. David quotes  a study that, in part, concluded that attitude was more influential on the ageing process than blood pressure, cholesterol levels, smoking, body weight and even exercise levels in how long a person lived.

This really resonated (one of my favourite words). As he say, attitude really counts, no matter what number we attached to ourselves from a chronological perspective. If we have a negative preconceived idea of limitations of age, then will just live in accordance to that thought process. If, however, we program ourselves with a positive attitude, with the right mindset and, in the words of another author I love, John C Parkin, shout F**K IT, we give ourselves every chance of slowing the ageing process.

Another suggestion – as written about by Vivienne Duke, in These Wings Can Fly – is to release that inner child. I’ve use the expression in an earlier blog about it being TIME TO DANCE. But, as it observes in the book, children have no inhibitions. They view the world almost with awe. They don’t allow themselves to be aged by worry, worry, worry.

Too many people worry about ‘getting old’. One thing’s for sure, if you think about / worry about getting old, guess what? You’ll start to feel like you’re getting old. It’s not rocket science. It’s a mind over matter process. Think young, act young, feel young!

I love being daft, teasing people and generally being what some would regard as being immature.

The definition of immature – “having or showing an emotional or intellectual development appropriate to someone younger.” Well, if that’s as bad as it gets bring it on!

The definitions of all words are created by us, to suit us. So, I’m going to recreate the definition for immature “a person willing to let go of life’s preconceived views of how they should behave and who wants to have fun with as many people as they can. A person who wants to bring sunshine into someone’s life when they might be having a cloudy day. A person who wants to life in the present”.

To use a quote featured in These Wings Can Fly and used in part in a previous blog: –

“Dance like there’s nobody watching you
Love like you’ll never be hurt
Sing like there’s nobody listening
And live like it’s heaven on earth”
William W Purkey

So, if you see me walking down the street, don’t walk on by. Don’t ask my age. Let’s have a little sing and dance.

And this is where I will close. I might just put a bit of lively music on for a quick jig in the kitchen. Come and join me. Let’s dance!

Take care of yourself. Take care of your family and friends. Take care of those who need a hand to hold. Take care of our beautiful planet.

As usual. Apologies for any typos. I’m open to applications for proof reading. Payment by means of gratitude.
Jon

A view from the ground look at mindfulness

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“Be happy in the moment, that’s enough. Each moment is all we need, not more.” ― Mother Teresa.

At this moment, as I sit revving up for another great day ahead, I’m happy. Why? I woke up; it’s the weekend; we had a great time with friends last night; and I’m drinking a smoothie consisting of kale, 6 different fruits, almonds and goji berries – rather than a bacon and black pudding sandwich. Clearly, I chose the correct option for breakfast. To be fair, the decision was easy. I love smoothies and we don’t have any bacon or black pudding. But I still feel happy.

Welcome to a new blog. Welcome to a new day. Welcome to the moment.

Anyone who has read the last blog – Live for the moment ……….. but please throw my mouse – will already know that I working hard on living in the moment; the present. I’ve spent too much time worrying, worrying, worrying.

Worrying about yesterday. What could I have done better?

Worrying about tomorrow. What’s going to happen? Is it going to be good? What’s going to go wrong?

Worrying about what people think of me, of my blogs, of my personal development. Why have some people suddenly become invisible? Is it because I / we openly express our views, which may not be the same as others?

But, I’ve realised this has to stop. I’m understanding the importance of enjoying ‘the now’. And since I’ve start to enjoy the now, the yesterday and the tomorrow have started to fade. Of course, I still reflect on what has gone before but nothing like as much. I know I am at the early stages of my path towards purely focussing on living in the present but I’m enjoying it so far.

So – mindfulness. A subject that has been at the core of my thinking for a long time now. It’s a word that is becoming more common in every day language.

Mindfulness – “the quality or state of being conscious or aware of something.”

Or, putting it another way, mindfulness – “a mental state achieved by focusing one’s awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one’s feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations, used as a therapeutic technique.” Now we’re talking.

I read any article that the wonderful Jean Garrod shared on Facebook recently, called ‘A Mindful Day At Work, by Dr. Takesha Cox.

Dr. Cox is a school social worker at a high school in Washington DC. Many of the students at the school deal with neighbourhood violence, grief and loss, poverty, below average reading and math skills, abuse and neglect from their families, abandonment, teen pregnancy and parenting, and the lack of resources that they need to be successful socially, emotionally, and academically.

Dr. Cox is a mindfulness practitioner and she has delivered a lesson called “Heartfulness” to great effect.

There was another article recently about some Canadian police meditating.

Just thinking about all of this gave me real hope. Mindfulness, heartfulness, meditation – basically all practices that work towards a “a mental state achieved by focusing one’s awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one’s feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations”.

A lot of us want to achieve this basic awareness on the present moment, but we spend too much time working about yesterday and / or fretting about what might happen tomorrow. As I write this I am facing a battle to stop thinking about what tomorrow might bright. However, the great thing with writing is that it helps me to concentrate on the exact thing I am talking about – living in the now.

Here’s a broad statement. There’s too much anger in the world. In fact, there’s just too much anger – full stop. We spend too much time angry. When I say ‘we’, I am just speaking broadly. That anger comes out of worrying about yesterday and how that might develop into tomorrow. But, what about today? Today? If we could just grasp the concept of dealing with today – with a smile, a laugh, a dance, and a lot of gratitude, sure when tomorrow becomes today we can do the same all over again?

Am I simplifying things? I hope not. I’m just seeking a state of mind for me, and everyone else who wants to join me, where we just enjoy the now. And by practicing mindfulness, we can take a massive step towards that state of mind.

Of course, we could move on to talking about meditation. I’ve covered that in earlier blogs and do intend to re-explore the joy of meditation because I still love just zoning out and just disappearing into my peaceful place. That place when even living in the now feels a bit too much. I’ll leave it there for now, but am happy to discuss my views on meditation with anyone and everyone.

And that’s where I’ll close. A quick quote – “Life is a dance. Mindfulness is witnessing that dance.”
― Amit Ray,

Enjoy the dance.

Jon

Ps – sorry for the typos. I need a proof reader!

 

 

Live for the moment ………. but please throw my mouse

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View from the ground

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“I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it.” ― Groucho Marx.

Wonderful words, which I wish I’d read yesterday. There’s irony because, as Groucho says, yesterday is dead. But, when yesterday was today, it didn’t start very happy.

I’m sure there are many people who can resonate – waking up, getting up, thinking through what the day holds (after expressing genuine gratitude for waking up). And then for no reason at all, your brain switches into a deep thinking mode. When you start to reflect on what is going on in life – be that what’s on the news; be that what’s happening in your working life; be that what your are going to eat today (whilst being grateful that you have food); be that everything else that is in your head.

So, welcome to another view from the ground. Fear not, as always, this blog has a happy ending.

Thank you for visiting www.viewfromtheground.co.uk, and thank you for taking the time to read my blog. As I always say, these words are just my observations on and interpretation of life and are not intended to direct anyone’s thinking. I do hope, however, that by sharing my observations and interpretation it can provide reassurance to others who may have the same thoughts but have wondered if they are on their own and basically losing the plot. The good news is, not you’re not and my dream is that, over time, we can all connect and walk our path forward together.

Anyway, the morning that inspired this blog was a little more than just thinking about the day ahead. As I sat their, at 6:30 am, my mind was full of everything that was going on in my life. About what had happened that week; what was about to happen in the day; what was probably going to happen the next day; about Ben going to the USA in June for 2 1/2 months; about Liv going to university in September. And that all lead me to reminisce about the joy of our wonderful family holidays, and how I wished we could go back in time. And then I got tearful. Why can’t life just go back to how it was? Worry, worry, worry.

As I left my room of contemplation (I’ll leave it to the imagination which room I’m referring to 😀) I was greeted by our cat, Zeekee. Clearly, she had had a similar moment of thinking because she dropped her toy mouse at my feet and waited expectantly. Thinking? Actually, no.

Before I continue – a bit of background about Zeekee.

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She’s been with us for just short of 3 months now and she’s 8 months old. It could be said Zeekee has a personality crisis. She talks to us – although a lot of it is directed at me when I tell her off, as she basically tells me off and always wants the last word. Mmmmm, a female wanting the last word? Well, it’s not lost on me anyway.

Zeekee also thinks she’s a dog. As I mentioned above, she had dropped her sponge mouse at my feet. The idea being that I would pick it up and throw it, for Zeekee to chase, pick up and bring it back to me, and the whole process to be repeated – usually 20+ times. I kid you not! Madness and wonderful in equal measures. The toy mouse is just a pink sponge ‘thing’ but she loves it.

My point though is, Zeekee is living in that exact moment. To her, it’s play time. Yes, she might have a look to see if there’s any food out. But she’s not thinking about the previous day, when there’s a good chance that the person she wants to play with had told her off – again. She’s not been laying on her blanket, reading the news on an iPad. She’s not reminiscing about her life before she joined us (thankfully, because it wasn’t good). She’s not thinking about what will be happening beyond that specific moment – when she would be very grateful if I could possibly play. In essence, she’s living in the exact moment.

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It was a real wake up call. Whilst I worry, worry, worry, Zeekee wants to play, play, play. Now, the theme of my last blog – Let’s make a song and dance about it aka time to dance – (I like long blog titles!) talked about the positive effects of song and dance. As I said in the blog TIME TO DANCE!

Let’s change that slightly for this blog – TIME TO PLAY! Time to live in the moment. Time to sit down, throw the mouse, throw the mouse, throw the mouse. Enjoy Zeekee’s moment.

Reality check – we can’t turn back the clock. And, if we could repeat those ‘good old times’, would they be as good second time around? We should feel lucky (blessed!) to have those experiences in our memory to smile about. Why worry about the day ahead? We certainly need to plan, but surely we should plan for a good day? What about tomorrow? Well, when we wake up tomorrow – that’s a blessing because it means we’ve been given the opportunity to make the most of the gift of life.

I accept this all sound could in principle. But, actually, in practice it can be even better because we can effect it. We can decide it’s TIME TO PLAY. We can decide to smile, we can decide to enjoy the moment and not worry.

At the moment, I’m sharing my drive to work with someone who lives next door. I enjoy her company as we have a variety of conversations. But last week, she said something I hadn’t heard before – in that depression is linked with worrying about the past, whereas as anxiety is worrying about the future.

Interesting! Just think how just living in the moment could help us all. Easier said than done? That’s up to us. Again, I look at Zeekee as I type and she’s just picked up her mouse because it’s TIME TO PLAY. Me? Well, I’ve got the news on in the background whilst working hard on not thinking about tomorrow. I’m trying to live in the moment, which I guess I am because I’m still typing – rather than preparing the family evening dinner.

I hope you will join me in my personal steps forward towards enjoying the moment; celebrating the past but not longing for its return; and waiting until tomorrow is today.

Okay, I will draw to a close. In doing so, I am going to sit back – with the glass of red wine that Viv has just given me (thank you) – and celebrate today. The walk, the family, the fun, the life!

Thank you for joining me. As I always say, I would love people to share their stories with me to publish on the website.

Take care, and don’t forget to throw the mouse.
Jon

Let’s make a song and dance about it aka time to dance

Posted on by View from the ground

View from the ground

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“Music was my first love
And it will be my last
Music of the future
And music of the past

To live without my music
Would be impossible to do
In this world of troubles
My music pulls me through”

The words of John Miles from 1976. Still a song that I have whirling through my mind. Partly because it’s very good, but mainly because those few words really resonate.

So, welcome to the latest grounded view.

What a week! Well, when I say what a week I am referring to my observations of the broadcasted news. When I say broadcasted news I am referring to what we are being told. When I say what we are being told, I mean I believe we are being fed what the broadcast company owners WANT us to know. When I say ………………… I’m sure you get the message.

Conspiracy theorist? Not at all. I just like to reflect on what I feel, in the hope that it inspires others to think and form their own thoughts around what is going on.

As for the news we have been fed this week, it really makes you wonder how much longer it will be before the masses gather and say – as one united voice – ENOUGH. As I write this paragraph I have the displeasure of listening to one political voice concentrating his diatribe against the UK Prime Minister rather than focussing on what the government can and will do – together! – to improve things for the population. I’ll refrain from commenting about the UK Prime Minister. Words aren’t needed or appropriate.

Naive? I don’t think so? Just a hope that the politicians that we put in positions of power did the job that we elect them to do rather than continually criticising each other time and time again. No wonder the world is in decline. They haven’t got a clue!

Anyway, as usual, I have strayed into a subject which wasn’t meant as the basis of the blog. However, there is a tenuous link as I have been doing a lot of thinking about escapism. Escapism? Yes, escapism. I’m sure there are millions of people who feel that their day is just a blur of routine. Usually following: –

* Alarm wakes up
* Wash, dress, feed and ready for work / the day
* Travel to work
* Work, work, work
* Travel home from work
* Cook / watching someone cooking
* Eat, talk, reflect
* Relax
* Bed
* ……… And do it again tomorrow

Now, of course, when you are working through your day, don’t forget to do your gratitudes. I’ve written many blogs on gratitude – these are still on the View From The Ground section on www.thesewingscanfly.wordpress.com. I’m rather proud of them.

And – key gratitudes are being alive, having a house, having clothes, having food, having a job, having a family to talk to …………… and that’s just starting! So, please don’t read that I am taking the above for granted.

But, we have it in our power to break the routine., shake off those chains of monotony, to say this is my one chance so (in this life anyway) TIME TO DANCE!

Mmmmmm – where is this going? Those who know me know I am not a gifted mover – unless last orders are called at the pub. But here’s the big but (note the spelling, so I’m not referring to my expanding rear) – we, my friends, don’t need to be gifted movers. We just need to move. As if the prove a point, I’ve just played Mr. Blue Sky by the awesome ELO (more on them in a bit) and found myself jigging in the kitchen. I love it. The release of music. Finding a great song gives you licence to say TIME TO DANCE.

Just think about the effect music can have on us. I’ve mentioned above ELO. Viv and I were fortunate – blessed it could be said – to see Jeff Lynne’s ELO last night at the magnificent Leeds Arena (one of the best venues I have been to). I’ve seen 200+ concerts, but last night was the best. The anticipation was phenomenal. Maybe because ELO are one of my all time favourite bands. But it was the collective excitement. And, then, the intro music and it was TIME TO DANCE.

I was surprised how many people stayed seated. Obviously they were enjoying the show. But, for 90 minutes, this was a chance for escapism; it was living in the moment (that’s a subject for a future blog); or in the words of Jeff Lynne, it was a living thing. Some people may have turn(ed) to stone but, it might have been some secret messages which just made us walk the tightrope and dance. If you don’t know ELO, I will apologise for those song references. They just came to me out of the blue.

But, that’s just it – music gives you chance to lose yourself, and to dance like you don’t. You can release your inner child and, before you know it, what ever was bothering you a minute previously has gone.

Well, Viv and I definitely lost ourselves in the magic of the concert. It has to be said, a couple of glasses of red wine helped me to dance like no one was watching. To be fair, they weren’t. What was going on in front, on the stage was the focus – although those seated behind us may question that.

What’s wrong with a couple of red wines to loosen things up though? A glass of red is another one of life’s pleasures. It’s certainly something a lot of us enjoy. I’ve recently heard it suggested that people have a drink when they get home from work as it could be regarded as a norm in society. I beg to differ. I have a drink when I get home because I enjoy a glass of red wine, and that’s the end of it. And I certainly enjoyed the red wine, the music and the dancing at Jeff Lynne’s ELO concert.

Still on the subject of music. How many of us sit in the car, something has been bothering us and then – bang – a great song comes on your CD, iPlayer, the radio etc, and we just lose ourselves in the moment, the magic. We sing, we wiggle, we release the inner child again.

We need to use music more to release ourselves from the routine; to dance like no one is watching. Who cares!

How about trying this technique the next time that you are wound up, or getting frustrated about something; remove yourself from the situation, find a room, put on some music or think of a song and then it’s TIME TO DANCE. Release your frustration. Slightly left of centre thinking, but try it. Might even be worth a try at work. If you do, let me know how it goes.

Music and dance can be used in so many situations to lift the spirits, and at this moment in time there are many people who need to do that. So, my feeling is we should lose ourselves in the music and use it as the here and now.

So, let the music play, have fun, be yourself and don’t be dictated to. This is your life to enjoy. I’d love to heard stories where perhaps your have had a dance like no one is watching. Please share your stories. I would love to post them on the blog site.

Until the next time. And if you spot the odd typo, sorry, I was dancing.

Jon

Please can I go out to play

Posted on by View from the ground

View from the ground

image

Hi and welcome to the latest view from the ground. Welcome to the new www.viewfromtheground.co.uk blog site. There’s still work to be done but I’m pleased to have my own space for these blogs. That said, whilst we go through a transitional phase I will be reposting the blogs on www.thesewingscanfly.wordpress.com for a short time. But the View From The Ground blogs needed their own place as my path has evolved in a different direction. Spiritual? I would say so. But very much rooted at a level where I want to help as many people as possible understand changes they are feeling and seeing, but without scaring them. The word ‘spiritual’ can scare people a bit but then when you look at a definition – ‘relating to or affecting the human spirit or soul as opposed to material or physical things’ hopefully this can be related to be many of us?

There is no doubt that times they are ‘a changin’, as Bob Dylan prophesied many years ago. Interesting! I had a Facebook message exchange yesterday and reflected on changing times and that has stuck in my head. They are changing on a global level, on a national level, on a local level and, definitely, on a personal level.

With that thought in mind I looked up the lyrics to ‘The Times They Are A-Changin’ and was struck by how appropriate they are for today, so I wanted to share them: –

“Come gather ’round people
Wherever you roam
And admit that the waters
Around you have grown
And accept it that soon
You’ll be drenched to the bone
If your time to you
Is worth savin’
Then you better start swimmin’
Or you’ll sink like a stone
For the times they are a-changin’

Come writers and critics
Who prophesize with your pen
And keep your eyes wide
The chance won’t come again
And don’t speak too soon
For the wheel’s still in spin
And there’s no tellin’ who
That it’s namin’
For the loser now
Will be later to win
For the times they are a-changin’

Come senators, congressmen
Please heed the call
Don’t stand in the doorway
Don’t block up the hall
For he that gets hurt
Will be he who has stalled
There’s a battle outside ragin’
It’ll soon shake your windows
And rattle your walls
For the times they are a-changin’

Come mothers and fathers
Throughout the land
And don’t criticize
What you can’t understand
Your sons and your daughters
Are beyond your command
Your old road is rapidly agin’
Please get out of the new one
If you can’t lend your hand
For the times they are a-changin'”

It certainly made me think. However, those who have followed my on the winding road from my view from the ground will know, I do a lot of thinking. My life purpose, I am told, is as interpreter. It’s a grander title but, basically, I look to interpret what I see and hear into plain speak. Some people like to talk in riddles and, perhaps, be seen as a higher source of information / knowledge. I look to filter what I hear and turn it into something a little more understandable.

To be fair, when I set out to put this blog together, as is the usual case, my thinking had been around a different place.

In this intense world that we seem to be operating in, our whole focus is on work – be that employed / self employed work, family work, home related work – we have little time to rest and certainly no time to play.

Play? Exactly. Play! I believe many of us have forgot to play. In fact, we’ve forgotten how to play. As I read recently (sorry, yes, I’m reading again) play is not just important for children, it is an important source of relaxation and stimulation for us adults as well. Playing with your significant other (assuming they agree!), friends, colleagues, pets (I can say that now we have our beautiful cat), and your children is a perfect way to stimulate way your imagination, your creativity and, most importantly, your emotional well-being. On top of all of that, it is fun! So, why have so many of us forgotten how to play?

I had a think about my typical working day. Out of bed, prepare and consume breakfast; prepare lunch; feed the cat; get dressed etc. Into work by 8:00 am. At the office until circa 6:00 pm, home b circa 6:45 pm. Sit down to eat by 8:00 pm (having cooked or assisted). If I’m lucky, out for a quick walk at 9:00 pm, and back in time for a bath at about 10:15 pm. And the day is done ……………… until tomorrow.
Where is the time for play? Okay, a talk during the evening meal (assuming I have company); a walk and talk; throwing the sponge mouse for the cat to retrieve, as she thinks she’s a dog, could be classed as play. However, it’s not good old fashioned play. Active play.

We need to try and remember what play used to be. Throwing a ball around in the garden? Sitting around a table having a laugh. Playing a board game. Going out for a bike ride, or a long walk whilst it is daylight. Basically, something that allows your brain to switch off from that thing that we call life. You could say, something that allows you to go back to that state your could enjoy as a child – not having a worry in the world. Unconditional fun!

Just think about the possible benefits of playing – particularly when it involves some else, or a pet. This can add to your joy of life, and theirs.
The clearest benefit of play is stress relief. Play is fun and it’s an escape, a distraction. It can trigger the release of endorphins, promoting an overall sense of well-being. Play can also enhance brain function. Activities such as completing crosswords, puzzles etc, playing chess or some other ‘play’ activities that challenge the brain can help prevent memory problems and improve brain function. It’s like any form of positive exercise. The more you do it, the stronger you can make what you exercising.

Sitting around the table, talking or playing with family and friends can also help ward off stress and depression. Again, distraction? Or, actually, is the play and interaction actually reality? Is all of the other stuff the distraction? I’ll leave that thought with you.

And, another, important reason for play is to allow it to help keep you feeling young and energetic. As George Bernard Shaw says right at the start of this blog, “We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.” Age is a number, and is inevitable. However, ageing is a choice – or at least the speed at which we age is.

One thing for certain is that times, they are a-changin. Our ability to deal with the changing times will be enhanced through maintaining a high level of of energy and a high level of happiness.

I would like to finish with my favourite John Lennon quote: –

image

Take care of yourselves. Now, get outside and start playing. And, please, be happy.

Speak soon. If you want contact me direct, and me an email – jonlduke@icloud.com. Alternatively, I’m on Facebook, as Jon Duke (never one for being overly creative). In addition, there’s a View From The Ground Facebook page + I’m on Twitter as @viewftg. It would be good to hear from you.

Finally, my usual disclaimer for any typos. This is all written from the heart.
Jon

A new beginning

Posted on by View from the ground

Jon's phone - jan - feb 2016 056

Welcome to the first View From The Ground blog on the new View From The Ground blog site. It’s a first and very new! Have I already said that?

It’s definitely a new beginning and I hope that you will join me on my continued development. I’m not going to call it a journey. That’s Corporate, 20th century speak. So, we’ll call it a development. It’s a development in self belief, self love, continued focus on gratitude, and overall mindfulness.

Anyway – welcome.

For the last 20 months I’ve been publishing blogs on the These Wings Can Fly blog site. All have been published as View From The Ground, and you may want to take a peek – http://www.thesewingscanfly.wordpress.com.

To be honest, this is a test blog to see how it works but what I would love to do is share one of my favourite blogs from the past. So, please read on – I’ve copied it below. I hope you enjoy it and I hope you will join me on this path of development. It will be fun – honest.

So, here we go, word for word – including links to previous blogs: –

1. 5.10. Make it count – A view from the ground

A View from the Ground – The Journal from Jon

After a recent View From The Ground blog – ‘My life purpose. Revealed’ – I was flattered and touched by some truly incredible feedback. It’s been wonderful to see how many people have taken time to read my blogs, as I do really enjoy writing them. When I say ‘writing’, it is more a case of having an inspired moment and then I let my fingers do the work. I won’t continue on that theme, to avoid going in an entirely inappropriate direction.

On the basis that my life purpose has been published, along with the transcript from Viv’s shamanic meditation, I am pretty much an open book. Those that know me will understand how (on the face of it) uncomfortable that makes me feel. I have already stated that I am a private person, and yet now I have revealed that I am the Interpreter for Healing and Humanity. Perhaps I should get a tee-shirt with that on. Over the coming weeks, I expect the actual depth of this role will become more apparent. I look forward to finding out more and will share my learnings on future blogs.

I have thought further about being told in the meditation that I should loosen my tie. Well, I’ve taken this by the neck (get the anatomical humour!) and in the last week I have had 2 days in the office week without a tie on. I was worried that I might get told off. No!!! There I go worrying again (you need to read the above mentioned blog to understand that reference).

In reality, the loosen the tie reference is an instruction for me to relax, be less formal and, I guess, open my mind a little more. Whilst I have been on this journey with Viv there is no doubt that I have become more open minded. However, I do sometimes have momentary lapses of bloody-mindedness. Where I have an opinion and that is it. However, to fulfil the role as the Interpreter for Healing and Humanity, I need to open my mind to everything.

Now, as I type this, sitting home alone on a Sunday afternoon – glass of red wine in front of me; bracelet on a different wrist due to having a minor bout of road rage earlier (see the blog Red Raw Wrist) – this was justifiable as some Muppet didn’t realise a green traffic light signals time to move; Niall playing on the IPod (check him out at www.niallmusic.co.uk and on Twitter – @worldmusicniall. He has an excellent new CD – Total Serenity); I feel the need for a meditation, so will be back soon.

20 minutes later – wow! Very relaxed, having used one of the tracks from Niall’s new CD. At risk of repeating myself from earlier blogs, if someone had told me I would meditate most days 2 years ago I would have laughed out loud.

I find meditation an incredible practice and one at which I am very much a learner. It is becoming apparent that a lot more people meditate than I realised. I read a great Dalai Lama quote “If every 8 year old in the world is taught to meditate, we will eliminate violence from the world within one generation”. I find this amazing. Just think. Is it really that difficult to imagine teaching every 8 year old to meditate?

This brings me onto the title for this blog – ‘1 5 10’. It kind of goes hand in hand with the Dalai Lama quote but I guess I am thinking of starting on a small scale. My thinking is what difference could we make to the community / the world by starting with a 1 percent shift in how we think; how we behave; how we treat each other.

Think about it. If tomorrow, you smiled at everyone you see. Accepting that there will be a small group of people who will think you are weird (definition – very strange and unusual, unexpected, or not natural. See my previous blog for more on this subject), but the majority of people will walk away feeling a little bit happier. They in turn may then smile at people they see and, within minutes your act of happiness spreads throughout your community. That one act by you may cause a one percent shift in your community.

It’s all about taking progressive steps – start at a one percent shift, move to five percent (accepting that is a 500% increase in effort), and then step up to a ten percent short (and that is only a 200% increase).

I look back on my personal journey and would like to think that by sharing what I have learned – mainly through Viv – can help others step forward and start improving their own lives, through positive thinking, through being grateful for life, and through feeling love.

That moves me, seamlessly, onto a learning from my shamanic meditation. I was told I am to “Love everyone as you love Vivienne, Benjamin and Livia. Think of all your thoughts and feelings for Vivienne, Benjamin and Livia. Spread this out to humanity.”

Those who know me know I am a very private person, not in the slightest tactile, and am overall limited in how I show my affection. So, to be told my role is to love everyone as I do my nearest and dearest placed me in a bit of a dither.

However, this part of the role also links to a wider definition to ‘loosen the tie’. As I have said before, I always thought my life purpose was to protect Viv, Ben, and Liv. However, the meditation has told me to loosen that tie and love everyone, to protect everyone.

It was a big eye opener and I take the message as one of taking the care and kindness that I show to Viv, Ben and Liv out into the wider community. Ultimately, if we all cared for each other just ten percent more, imagine what a positive effect that would have. So, if my role is to take the baton and start the race towards a more caring, loving society – bring it on (but, my only request is for some leniency on Mondays).

It is an interesting aspect of my personal role and something that has caused me further reflection. In reality, I am a naturally caring person – but perhaps I have limited the caring to my family and friends. I would like to think I am caring within the work environment, but some may argue that point. I now see that I must open my eye, loosen the tie, and be aware of the wider need to love everyone. Updates will follow on how this progresses.

So, there it is. As I said in the ‘My life purpose. Revealed’ blog, I accept the role I have been granted, and promise that I will do all within my power to succeed. I will tackle it in sensible stages – and will make a one percent difference; five percent difference; and ten percent difference. My challenge to everyone who reads this – do the same. Please join me on this quest, this journey. I would love to hear about what you are doing.

And – look at that, this is the first blog that I have managed to complete without a single plug for the magnificent, 5 star rated, book – These Wings Can Fly. On the basis of my success, you might like to celebrate with me by going to Amazon.co.uk or Amazon.com and having a look at how you can obtain a copy of the book. Whilst you are there, I would strongly recommend that you continue celebrating by having a look at Vivienne Duke’s second book,  Awaken Your Inner Hero.

Love life; it’s yours to enjoy. Help your neighbours, you never know just how grateful they may be. Laugh a lot, you may just cheers someone up who is feeling a little sad.

Love and peace to all.

Jon