The answer is – a) Poor me; b) Pour me; or c) Paw me aka Cleaning out my closet (#Team Duke – the series)


“When you are here and now, sitting totally, not jumping ahead, the miracle has happened. To be in the moment is the miracle.” – Osho

“You can spend minutes, hours, days, weeks, or even months over-analysing a situation; trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could’ve, would’ve happened… or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and move the fuck on.”
― Tupac Shakur

Oh no! A blog about ‘that’ subject again. Noooooooooo! Fear not, whilst I might reflect (but, so does a mirror. There’s a thought – mirror mirror on the wall, what do you see? Well, now that’s a good question. However, the more relevant question is, what do you see? Is it you or is it a clone? Are you a member of the clone roses brigade?), this is all about cleaning out my closet. Mmmm ‘n’ mmmmmmm.

Hello and welcome to my field of dreams, where I perch to observe and smile.

Following some recent blogs, I have been made aware that they may have been misinterpreted, as they appear to have caused the reader to go to Facebook to express their views – not directly, so maybe I’m being over sensitive. I do have a tendency to be a tad sensitive at times. With reason? You decide.

Anyway, the joys of social media also allow me to restate the purpose of the blogs. So, for the record, they are: –
* written from the heart and with love;
* a reflection of the journey that we have been on for the last 14 months and more;
* honest;
* an open expression of love for family and friends; and
* not written for the consumption of others who want to use the intent of the blogs to massage their guilt / ego / ‘beliefs’.

If the #TeamDuke blogs can inspire others in this world filled with ego, bring it on.

So, any deluded, shapeshifting, ‘we’re on a soul journey’ people out there, I suggest you don’t read on. I’m sure you’ll find 144,000 reasons to think this blog is about you. Don’t forget, save the cheerleader, save the world 😜. Although, as the worldly wise Tina Turner once observed from her view from the stage, ‘we don’t need another hero’. Yatta!

Is this playing out the poor me syndrome? The regular reader will know that I’ve mentioned previously ‘poor me’. It’s a concept from the Celestine Prophecy (excellent book) and it’s something I have had pointed at me in the past. You know what, I agree! I realise I could / can feel blood sorry for myself. Hello, I’m a man, that’s what we do best!! (Exclamation mark frenzy creeping in!!!!!!!!). However, the definition below, lifted from t’internet, is a different kind of person, I believe. A special kind of person. I’ll just leave the words, as below, hanging there as we pause for thought.

‘Poor me’s make us feel guilty and responsible for them. They complain and whinge about problems, offering no solutions. They make you feel guilty when you’re in their presence, even though you know there is no reason to feel that way. Everything they say and do puts you in a place where you have to defend against the idea that you’re not doing enough for them.’

No, please be assured, I’m not play the ‘poor me’ now. I’m celebrating the purpose of the blogs and am grateful for the support that the blogs, and #TeamDuke, continue to receive. Thank you, and similarly thank you from my heart for the beautiful feedback and comments received.

So, another blog in the world of #TeamDuke. In the words of M People, we continue to be moving on up through what has been a real year of progress. Our unity just goes from strength to strength, as we work together as a ……….. team. All for one and one for all! As the regular reader will know (note, I keep referring to ‘reader’ not ‘readers’, as I don’t want to make assumptions), our ‘team’ is a collective of all who want to join us, but the core unit expanded this year with the inclusion of the truly wonderful Audrey. Never has a person completely shown unconditional love – in my eyes – than Audrey. And, the magic is, she doesn’t realise it. So many could learn from her.

But one of my own personal learnings through the past few months, as previously written – #TeamDuke raise a glass and toast routine, is to break routine.

I’m a regular user of Facebook and, as had been pointed out, I did like to share posts about my love of red wine. And rose. And beer. And …… I think you get the picture. I do love a drink but, after my rude awakening last year, I started to thing – do I love a drink or does a drink love me? You know the pattern, a hard day at work, you get home and before you know it you’ve poured a glass of wine. It was a routine.

I’d have a glass of wine, maybe a glass and a half. It just happened. I won’t explore how having a glass and a half of shared bottle of wine always resulted in an empty bottle.

Anyway, time to change the routine. I’m certainly not preaching the virtues of not having a glass of wine. But, and I know to most this will sound obvious, but a nice cuppa tea hits the spot perfectly.

I guess I needed an awakening to realise I had to clean out the wine drinking closet and become me. Glass of wine? Not tonight, I’m have a cuppa. Never night, glass of wine? Don’t mind if I do. As Chicago sang, it’s been a hard habit to break but my new, vibrant, energised, happy, fun, positive (YES, WE GET THE PICTURE!!!! ENOUGH!!) life has opened my eyes. To paraphrase another song, you don’t have to have a drink to have a good time – oh no.

Having said all of the above, I’ve just spend 3 days travelling in and out of the Leeds Festival with Ben (who paid for me 😅) and have been polishing off a couple of drinks before midday. Hypocritical? Nah. Live for the moment, that’s all I’m getting at. It’s been a case of stopping pour me before it became poor me.

Again, as has been written, another welcome addition to #TeamDuke has been our beautiful dog, Ringo. Such a bundle of fun, energy, positivity, and love. When it feels like the weight of the world is falling onto your shoulders, the love of a dog is quite overwhelming (although the sound of him right now pacing and panting because he wants a walk is overwhelming for different reasons). He’s now taken to throw a front leg over me when I’m in bed in the morning to remind me to live in the moment and …….. feel the love. It’s his paw me moment. A damned sight better than poor me or pour me.

Have you chosen your answer to the question in the title?

As so, to close. Cleaning out my closet? As you can tell from this any recent blogs, there has been a lot of cleansing going on for #TeamDuke. A lot of cleaning. The local charity shop will soon benefit from some clothing. There’s still a few copies of the book – These Wings Can Fly. I wrote a blog last year about the 6 degrees of separation. Well I wonder if I, 6 people away from meeting the person who can turn that work of fiction, fabrication, and folly (3 F’s) into a film. I can already see the queue of actors wanting to join in – particularly the actor who plays Captain Obvious in the advertisements in the UK. He would be perfect for the ‘male’ (note, not man) lead. Look the actor up.

I’m afraid some of the books have had to go. 50 Shades Of Purple was a bit of an odd one. I’m not sure I get the channeling of physical energy in the name of been twin souls will appeal to the right minded. Raven Bonkers Or Just Cuckoo is a sad read. Joking apart, I am not making light of mental health issues. As some who has flown in and out of depression for many years, and supported and being their for my daughter who has struggled on a much deeper basis, I know the seriousness of the illness. However, the key is recognising you are ill in the first place. But, with regards to the book title referred to – it helps to know the difference between a raven and a crow.

At that, I will close. As always, I’ve enjoyed writing this blog. I’ll leave you with a final concept I am working on – about how to change myself without changing me. I actually think I’m getting there. Think about it. Some people think they need a whole makeover when it’s just a bit of fine tuning.

I hope you have enjoyed reading these words. If you have, please spread the word. Together is far greater than apart.



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